Courageous: Afterlife Book Four Read online

  "Can't wait," I said with a smile.

  The baby answered by kicking me hard on the right side. I burst into laughter and soon tears were rolling down my cheeks. The feeling of having a life growing inside of me was so wondrous that no moody husband would ever be able to take that away from me. This baby was mine and no one could ever change that. Not even Mick.

  I took in a couple of deep breaths of the fresh air that smelled like a mixture of flowers and salty ocean. I loved this place and part of me felt sad that I had to leave it soon, but another part knew that what was waiting for me was so much more wonderful, even more than I could imagine.

  After a few more deep breaths I felt calm on the inside and closed the window again. I sat in a chair and tried to relax. I tried again. I rubbed my hands together and thought about what I wanted for breakfast. I was getting hungrier now so I added a couple of sausages to the eggs and a big glass of freshly squeezed orange juice.

  When I opened my eyes a bowl of porridge had appeared between my hands. I stared at it very disappointed. How come I suddenly had a difficult time making anything as simple as breakfast? I had done this a million times and I always got it right. I stared at my hands. What was going on with them? I shrugged then ate the porridge since I was now so hungry I couldn't wait any longer. The porridge wasn't terrible, but it wasn't really good either. It was just enough to make me and the baby full and happy.

  Mick returned after I was done eating. I felt a pinch in my stomach looking at him. His eyes were still angry. He was snorting angrily. I took my book and sat in a corner to read trying to not let his anger destroy my day. It was a book Rahmiel had given me called Pregnancy for the spirit woman. What to know. I loved reading in it and looking at all the pictures of spirit babies. They were so adorable and looked just like human babies, except their bodies - just as ours - were made from this light fluid wobbly material. They can fly from birth and go through walls and doors and stuff right away.

  "It says here in the book that it is up to us if we want to make him - or her - used to food like humans," I said looking at Mick.

  He didn't respond. He had his back turned at me while looking out a window.

  "I think it would be kind of nice for the baby to have the pleasure of eating, don't you? It's a decision we have to make as parents. If we chose to give the baby milk and later on real food, then we have to be aware that he or she will also need a diaper. If we chose not to feed the baby then we won't have to focus on changing diapers at all. Hmmm, kind of a difficult decision, don't you think? I mean I really want him to be able to eat with us and enjoy the taste of food like we do, but it does sound promising to not have to change diapers."

  "Maybe we could just wait and not introduce food till the baby is older?" Mick suggested.

  Finally he was softening up.

  "Can we do that?" I wondered.

  Mick turned and looked at me. His eyes were calm and nice again. I smiled. He floated towards me and sat next to me and looked in the book. "We're the parents aren't we?" he asked. "We make the decisions."

  I grabbed his hand in mine. It was nice to have him back.

  CHAPTER 6

  WE LEFT IN the afternoon. Mick hadn't wanted to tell me where we were going for our honeymoon, but I knew he had planned it for months so I was really excited.

  We were picked up by an old carriage driven by two magnificent Pegasus’s.

  "How very romantic," I said as Mick held the door for me and I entered the carriage. It was stunning. Beautifully hand-sculptured on the inside with heavy purple curtains.

  Abhik was in the crowd of people standing outside waving goodbye to us. He came to our chambers earlier that day while Mick and I were packing. When Mick left to get something in the kitchen downstairs Abhik had looked at the mirror in my hand curiously.

  "What's that?"

  I handed it to him with a smile. "A mirror. A real mirror that actually shows your reflection even if you're a spirit. It's really neat. Try it."

  "Hmm," he said and looked at his own reflection. "I didn't think they had mirrors here."

  "Neither did I, but Mick gave it to me. It was my wedding present."

  "It's beautiful," Abhik said and stared at his new wild hair. "Do you think it's a little much?" he asked and touched the thick black hair.

  I shook my head. "I think it's perfect for you."

  "Hmm," said Abhik and handed the mirror back to me. Then he looked at me seriously.

  "What was all that about yesterday?" he asked.

  I put my mirror and some baby books in my suitcase, it was about all I needed for the trip, I figured. I stared at him. "What are you talking about?"

  "Don't pretend it was nothing. I saw you two out on the balcony. You were arguing very loudly, I might add. Everybody heard you. Mick was yelling at you."

  I sat down. "It was my fault," I said. "I make him so mad. I don't know why I haven't learned by now."

  Abhik tilted his head and looked at me. "That's not how my Meghan usually speaks. What happened?"

  "Jason happened."

  Abhik nodded. "Ah, now I see."

  "It was a coincidence. It really was. I was getting some fresh air; you know how I feel about being the center of attention like that. I needed a break from it all and apparently so did he. So he joined me and we spoke for a few minutes. That was all there was to it. It's not like anything happened between us. He doesn't even remember who I am. He thinks we only know each other from the night we met on the cliffs and I felt the baby kick for the first time. That's all."

  Abhik looked at me like he wasn't quite satisfied with my answer.

  "What?" I asked.

  "Can you honestly tell me you didn't feel anything for him?"

  "You know I can't. But I'm married now. I made a choice and I can't turn back on it. I love Mick too. You know that."

  "I know you do, but please promise me that you won't let this tear you two apart," Abhik said with worry. "Don't let Jason come between you. Not again."

  "He is not between us in any way," I answered a little harder than I meant to. "It's over. It's just Mick who ... who keeps thinking that he should be threatened by him. There is no reason for it, really. I promise you there isn't."

  "I hear you, but you know Mick. He is from a different time. He is from a time when honor meant a great deal to people. Pride and honor means a lot to him. So promise me to be careful. I didn’t like the tone to his voice last night one bit. Are you even sure you want to go on this trip with him after what happened?"

  "He is my husband now. I’ll learn to deal with this somehow. It'll get better once we leave the castle for good and leave Jason behind us. Then he won't even be here to make Mick jealous ever again."

  Abhik stared at me, and then sighed.

  "Now what?" I asked.

  "What happens when Jason gets his file? In a couple of years he will graduate, receive his file and then he will suddenly remember everything. What then? What if he comes to find you?"

  I dropped my eyes to the ground. I had thought about that, a lot actually. I hoped that by then Mick and I would be so happily married with our child and a family that I would have forgotten about Jason, or I wouldn't even care about him. But I also thought my feelings for Jason would have disappeared by now, by the time I said I do at the altar. I realized they hadn’t last night when I stood close to him. I just didn't want to admit it to myself.

  Abhik put a finger under my chin and lifted my head. I looked into his brown eyes. I was so grateful to have a friend like him in this world. And now he wasn't even here anymore. He had gone to the next world.

  "Do you want me to stay here a couple of weeks?" Abhik asked. "I'm sure Mai won't mind."

  I sniffed and nodded. "Silly selfish me," I said. "I have been so caught up in all my stuff that I forgot to ask about the two of you. How are you doing? Are you getting serious?"

  Abhik shrugged. "We take it one day at a time. We have plenty of it, you know. But yes we enjoy eac
h other's company and that's the only thing that matters, isn't it?"

  "I guess," I said. It had been a long time since I had a good time with Mick. Maybe this honeymoon would change all that.

  "I could use your help with some stuff after I return," I said. "I have some things I would like to have done before I give birth. A few things in my past need to be sorted out."

  "I would love to help you with that," Abhik said.

  "I'll explain more once we've returned."

  Now I was looking at him through the window of the big carriage. He was standing in front of the crowd waving and smiling. I smiled back as the carriage started moving and soar quickly into the air. Soon Abhik was nothing than a dot on the ground as clouds surrounded us.

  "Where are we going?" I asked.

  "You'll see," Mick said. He was sitting in front of me with his hat in his hands. We were an odd couple, I thought to myself. He was so old-fashioned, always so elegant and graceful in his movements. A true gentleman. Then there was me. I was wearing jeans, a top and a small jacket. It had to look strange. I wondered what I was going to pick for my looks in Heaven. Abhik had told me that there were plenty of clothes and we didn't have to wear the same thing all the time like here on the castle. In Heaven it was all up to me. If I wanted a closet filled with the most wonderful dresses, then that was what I was going to get. Maybe I would pick some more old-fashioned stuff, I thought. To better match Mick. Maybe I would wear beautiful ball gowns all day long? I laughed at the thought.

  "What's so funny?" asked Mick.

  I shook my head. "Nothing. I was just thinking about going to Heaven and what it will be like. I'm looking forward to starting our life as a family." The baby began kicking as I spoke and I put my hand on it. It had grown since yesterday, I thought. Good thing my jeans could stretch.

  "It's kicking," I told Mick. "Do you want to feel it?"

  I grabbed his hand and put it on the bump. Just as I did the baby kicked and Mick gasped. I smiled and so did he.

  "I am certain that Rahmiel can provide you some maternity clothes. A big dress or something more comfortable," he said. "I'll ask her when we return. You have after all graduated so your situation is special. You are done with being vain."

  I looked at him. I guess I was done with all that. I knew that was why they let us look like we did when we died, to keep vanity out of our minds. And being as it was, that we couldn't see our own reflection in a mirror, there was really no reason to be vain. Still, I would like to wear a beautiful dress every now and then. I'd like to dress up for Mick since I enjoyed it when he looked at me in that way, like when he saw me in my wedding dress. He was so proud. I smiled and held his hand tight in mine.

  "Can't you just give me a little hint as to where we are going?" I asked.

  CHAPTER 7

  MICK WAS SILENT as the grave and kept a secretive look on his face as we soared further through the clouds and soon burst through the many layers of the atmosphere. The carriage bumped heavily as we left the exosphere, the outermost layer of the Earth's atmosphere. Then everything went quiet, only the sound of the Pegasus' big wings flapping eagerly to bring us through the thin air of outer space.

  "Did we just pass the moon?" I asked.

  "Sure did," Mick said and stared out the window as well.

  It was so dark and calm. Underneath us I spotted Earth getting smaller and smaller as we moved further out.

  "There goes Mars," Mick said.

  "Where are you taking me?" I asked with a smile. I had butterflies in my stomach. This was truly adventurous. I had been in outer space a few times but only briefly.

  "Jupiter," he continued as another planet rushed past us.

  "It's so colorful," I said. "And big."

  "Look at all the moons," Mick said. "There are sixty-two of them."

  "I can't believe how colorful they are!" I exclaimed.

  "That's because some of them are highly radioactive. Like Io, you see, the one right there. The radiation found in this area is a thousand times stronger than what is needed to kill a human. It's also covered in volcanoes that erupt constantly. Those are the ones that spurt out large amounts of sulfuric acid into the air which falls, causing the beautiful reds, yellows and orange colors of Io's appearance."

  "Wow," I said staring at Jupiter with its many moons passing by my window. "Have you ever been to another planet?" I asked. "Have you like ... set your foot on one?"

  "Plenty of times."

  "On Jupiter too?"

  "No. Jupiter is a very stormy planet. You risk getting pulled apart to beads like you did in that tornado once, remember that?"

  "Barely," I said ironically.

  "There are constant storms throughout Jupiter's atmosphere, and most of the storms never end. Just because it looks beautiful and endearing doesn't necessarily mean you should go there. The many different cloud formations and storms in the atmosphere make Jupiter this colorful a planet. The red spot in the middle of it, you see it here," he said and pointed at a huge crater. "This is caused by a giant storm that has been raging for at least three hundred years. It is commonly known as 'The Eye of Jupiter' because of its shape. This storm's super hurricane winds blow across an area that is larger than the Earth."

  "What about the moons?" I asked as we passed a flock. "Are they something you could visit?"

  "Not many of them. I once went on Europa here," he said and pointed at a brown moon. "She has liquid water ocean underneath her surface but is also cold and covered in ice. She has a hot core that heats up the water and makes it run underneath the ice. But she is cold and barren even if the conditions are there for her to be the only likely planet in this solar system to have life besides Earth. I also went to Titan once. That is one of Saturn's moons. It has lakes, rivers and oceans flowing with liquid methane."

  Jupiter with its amazing worlds circling it soon disappeared and became nothing but a dot in the distance. By the speed we were moving we would be out of our own solar system in a matter of minutes. I had to admit it scared me slightly, but Mick remained calm and mysteriously quiet. I figured he had everything under control, so I tried to just enjoy myself and the amazing view from my window. Behind us the sun glowed in the center of everything. It looked like a huge ball of fire. It glowed so bright I had to cover my eyes trying to look out of the back window. We were still far away from it and going further and further away, but close enough to see its active surface where it released massive amounts of gas and plasma into its own atmosphere. It was so alive, so vibrant, like a giant animal constantly breathing light and life to our small insignificant planet, even to our realm, the Spiritual realm.

  "It's beautiful," I said and turned around to face Mick again.

  "Just wait till you see where we are going," Mick smiled.

  Just as he had said the words, the Pegasus’s speeded up. I felt a jerk in the back as the carriage moved forward in a sudden move.

  "They're speeding up?" I asked.

  "Yes, we still have a few hours of travelling before we get there. Just enjoy the view."

  "A few more hours?"

  Mick nodded. I looked out at Saturn, then Uranus and finally Neptune passing us like they were nothing but small cities close to a highway.

  "But that will take us beyond our own solar system?"

  "Even further than that," Mick said.

  "Beyond the Milky Way? Beyond our own galaxy?" My eyes were wide and my voice shaking slightly.

  Mick didn't say anything, just kept nodding and looking out the window. I stared at the glowing band of stars arching across the sky in front of us. What were we going to find on the other side?

  "The Milky Way is a barred spiral galaxy one hundred to a hundred and twenty light-years in diameter containing between two hundred and four hundred billion stars. It may contain at least as many planets," Mick said as if he was reading my mind.

  "That's a lot," I said. "Are there any planets out there like Earth? Do any of them have life like we have it on Ea
rth?" I asked, wondering if he was taking me to some other planet.

  Mick shook his head. "Earth is very unique. Nothing like it in the entire universe."

  I was kind of relieved to hear that. We were moving closer to the band of stars and it grew bigger and bigger causing me to feel so small and insignificant next to the hundreds of billions of stars, burning suns just like our own that was floating in front of us. The hazy band became slowly clearer and brighter as we moved closer. The white light from the stars shone in the distance like was it trying to light up our path. It was truly stunning.